Monday, 1 September 2014

Dear Future Me (2)

To see last year's letter to my future self click here.

Dear Future Lucy,

You're 17 at the moment. 17 is the age where you're expected to act and think like an adult but in your mind you are still a child. It feels like yesterday that you were 14 and the thought that in less than 4 months you will be 18 and legally an adult is ever so slightly terrifying.

You've had to do a lot of thinking over the last few months, mainly in relation to university. You've had to decide what you want to study and where which sounds a lot simpler than it is. As always, you put too much pressure on the decision and build it up to be a decision that defines the rest of your life when the likelihood is, it won't. All of this has led to the development of what appears to be anxiety, although nothing is diagnosed.

Your cousins from New Zealand came back for 6 weeks this summer as always. Yet again, you've found yourself loving them even more than you did last year despite thinking that wasn't possible. Currently aged 7 and 3 they are both hilarious and adorable and you wish they lived closer although, you recognise that New Zealand is their home. You were best friends with them this year, in their words not yours, and have been promised that they will facetime you soon.

Music is still a prominent figure in your life although you've not written a song or uploaded a YouTube video in far too long. There isn't a reason for this, you just haven't felt inspired to which is fine. Your channel now has 139 wonderful people seeing your face pop up in their subscription boxes when you bother to upload anything and you've had some incredible opportunities in the last few months thanks to your decision to upload some videos to YouTube 3 years ago. You've met the lady who wrote Gold Rush with Ed Sheeran, one of your favourite songs of all time although you managed to remain cool and not blurt that out mid conversation, and you've worked with some incredible musicians who you now have the privilege of calling friends. You've also written an outro for one of your school friends who also has a YouTube channel which at this current point in time has over 2,000 subscribers and you feel lucky to have such incredibly talented friends who are lovely enough to give you that sort of opportunity and exposure.

Blogging has become a bigger part of your life this summer. You have put a lot of time and effort into each of your four, yes four, blogs and you're incredibly proud of them. Although you will probably constantly be updating and changing things you're very happy with how they are and you're incredibly thankful to your wonderful friend Ishani who helped you get them to that point. You have put the most work into your book blog which is getting more and more views by the day and you are now able to earn money from it as you now have an affiliate account with thebookdepository. Although you're yet to make a noticeable amount of money this way, it's exciting that the opportunity is there for you.

You got your AS results a few weeks back and although they're not as good as your GCSE ones were, you're not unhappy about them. You know it was the best you could've done at the time and that's the most important thing. They may be average results but you worked your butt off for them so you're proud nonetheless.

Things are okay at the moment. You're not super happy due to being terrified about university but you're surrounded by incredible people so you know you'll be fine in the end.

Until next time,

Lucy x